Stolen Car

An elderly Floridian called 911 on her cell phone to report that her car has been broken into. She is hysterical as she explains her situation to the dispatcher: "They've stolen the stereo, the steering wheel, the brake pedal and even the accelerator!" she cried. The dispatcher said, "Stay calm. An officer is on the way." A few minutes later, the officer radios in. "Disregard." He says, "She got in the back-seat by mistake."

Name On Your Bible

A devout cowboy lost his favorite Bible while he was mending fences out on the range.

Three weeks later a cow walked up carrying the Bible in its mouth!

The cowboy couldn't believe his eyes.  He took the book out of the cow's mouth, raised his eyes heavenward, and exclaimed, "It's a miracle!"

"Not really," said the cow. "Your name was written inside the cover."

Retaliation